18 Of The Most Clever Profile Covers For Agents
In this spirit of transparency, we admit we’re totally biased when we say “the most clever.” Why’s that? Because we created them. At any rate,
Routine Home Showing Turns Into 50 Shades of Kinky
Rebecca Slone, Associate Broker
Location: Lake Charles, LA
Company: Century 21 Bessette Realty
Fifty Shades of Kinky
I’ve seen almost everything in 16.5 years of selling real estate. I’ve seen guns and drug paraphernalia alongside children’s toys on a coffee table. I’ve seen naked people, dirty underwear left in the living room floor when they knew that the house was going to be shown. I’ve seen odd pets, nude pictures on the wall. You name it, I’ve seen it.
But one of the strangest things that I’ve ever seen was in a home that seemed very normal on the outside. It was a sprawling ranch style home. 3/2 with a “possible 4th”. After looking at the house, my client and I couldn’t find the possible 4th until we came to a door off of the laundry room. We opened the door to an all black room with black lights… which is weird enough, right?!? Oh no, it gets better! I tried to think quick for my client, “Maybe it’s a media room or something like that?” Then I opened up the closet.
We instantly knew it wasn’t a media room. There was a carpeted wheel with Velcro straps for wrists and ankles. It’s seems that they were “50 shades of kinky” before it was cool. We quickly made our exit from the home with quite the story to tell.
Haunted House or a Really Smart Squatter?
I was showing a very old, empty home in Brookfield, IL. I entered the home, turned on all the lights on the first level and stood in the picture window waiting for my clients.
First, I heard the thud…OK, the heat just kicked in and it is an OLD house. Then, I heard the shuffling…OK, it is a finished attic and maybe there’s a critter? Last, I heard the squeak of a metal cabinet door…I WAS OUT OF THERE!!!
My clients that day was a police officer and his wife. When he and his wife arrived, I told him what I had experienced. I said we could just leave, or I could give him my pepper spray and we could all walk through together. He chose to walk through…I was hoping for Option A.
We walked through the home, it was very pretty and all was quiet. We walked upstairs to the finished attic, at that point his wife called my name…as I looked over to her she opened the bathroom cabinet door that sounded EXACTLY like the noise I heard. I turned beet red I was so flustered. He laughed at me and she said “We’re out of here!”
We still laugh at that story today! I have no clue what exactly made the noises, but I hope I don’t experience that again!
Short Story about Drawers (the cloth kind, not wood)
I have a fear of snakes. Not a mild fear. A real, heart stopping, underwear-changing fear. My first open house ever was at a renovated farm house. Beautiful home, spectacular views, a true gem. I was doing my walk-thru, admiring all this home has to offer, when I decided to check out the finished basement.
Down the steps I went. I get to the bottom, turn the corner, and almost step on the largest snake I’ve ever seen! To say I retreated out of the house is putting it mildly. But I’m proud to say I gathered my wits, changed my underwear, and held the open house (although the basement was no longer part of my tour).
Diane Martin, Realtor
Location: Clarksville, TN
Be Careful Who You’re Sexting
Most embarrassing moment: When you accidentally send a naughty text to a client instead of your spouse. I learned you should never finish sending a text, if another text chimes in. Oh it was such an inappropriate text!
Dead Body?! Or Just a Day Sleeper?
I had scheduled an appointment for a house in a not-so-great part of town. I was told they had a day sleeper but that he would leave the residence for the showing. My client and I arrived at the house. I knocked several times and rang the doorbell. I thought to myself, “Good, no one here.”
I unlocked the door and we went in. We looked at every inch of the house, opening cabinets and doors. Then it happened! We get to the last bedroom and my client said, “Chick, that looks like a dead body in that bed.” I’m like, “No way.” She walked around the bedroom and all of a sudden this man threw the covers off, sat up and looked at us, and then covered his head back up and went back to sleep!
Mind you, I was about to pee on myself at this point, as we were both telling him we were so sorry. “We thought you were gone!” Needless to say I’m a little more leery about bumps in the bed nowadays!
A Shower Urinal? Seriously?
Showed a home where the seller put a urinal in the shower (in the bathroom that was open to the whole master bedroom).
