1. This baby still blames Alan Greenspan for the mortgage meltdown.

2. This baby would love to show you his old collection of MLS books.

3. This baby will turn you in to the real estate board faster than you can say “dual contract”.

4. This baby still uses a rolodex.

5. This baby prints out directions before showing homes.

6. This baby won’t stop talking about all the whippersnappers getting licensed these days.

7. This baby just called you from his Razr phone to ask where to fax the contract.

8. This baby’s email address ends with AOL.com.

9. This baby will offer you a Werther’s Original Caramel when you show up to his open house.

10. This baby will make you pick up a key before showing one of his listings.

11. This baby just dropped off a roll of film and can’t wait to see how your listing photos turn out.

12. This baby’s favorite topic of conversation is dual agency.

13. This baby still brags about the 14% interest rate he got on his first home in 1981.

14. This baby believes that a hearty handshake and stern eye contact will get more clients than your fancy Facebook ad.

15. This baby does the ‘removable thumb trick’ for every kid at his open house.

16. This baby arrives to CE class 20 minutes early to get front row seating.

17. This baby can’t survive open house boredom without AM radio.

18. This baby will begin negotiations… as soon as he remembers where he put his teeth.

19. This baby is disappointed that you’re considering selling your home, but haven’t called him yet.